Speaking of Green: "Review" of Final Crisis#2 and Hulk#4

The green in the title refers to several things. But it mostly refers to the nauseous feelings permeating my body after having read these two comics one after the other.

What can I say?

I am an IDIOT for punishment. Not learning my lesson from reading Final Crisis #1, perhaps in order to give Grant Morrison a chance to make up for that horrid issue, I picked up a copy of Final Crisis #2.

BIG MISTAKE.

I had to read this mess of storytelling twice before I even got more than a hint of what was going on. And I'm still confused. It's like Morrison loaded all his scenes and ideas into a shotgun, along with a bunch of major and minor players in the DCU, from A to Z, then SHOT it into a comic. Even J.G. Jones' artwork, normally wonderful to behold, suffers, probably because the poor penciller also had no idea what the hell Morrison was getting at as he no doubt described panel after confusing panel.

Where in God's name were the transitions? Where and what is everyone doing? Did time pass between this scene and the next? Is it the same day? Why did every hero in the DCU suddenly take a sip of Stoopid Juice? Who are some of these characters? Should I even care? One scene was flowing into the next like the effluent of a third world sewage plant.

The only remotely coherent scene was a funeral held for Jonn Jonn'z... on the surface of Mars. Hooray for the Boom Tube. God-level teleportation in the DCU, once the province of only the New Gods, that now it seems everybody can now use. Whoop.

Forget it.

I was fair. I gave Morrison a chance. I am never picking up another title written by this guy. Chuck Austen, one of the most maligned authors in modern comics history, told really bad stories. But even he didn't make me scratch my head in frustration.

Bah.

---

It's a sad, sad day when even Jeph Loeb fails me. Above is a picture of the Red Hulk smashing The Watcher's face. Yes, the same Watcher who helped humanity against Galactus, manifests himself at times of great universal change, and is counted as a cosmic being by many space entities. This is the comic equivalent of seeing the Pope tarred and feathered.

It gets worse. Not content to leave the ludicrous concept alone, Hulk #4 continues the pain, pretty much leaving the noble Uatu without any shred of dignity. I really wanna know what Jeph was smoking at the time he wrote this issue. I'd love to try some.

There's another thing about this new series which irks me. Why, oh why, did Marvel allow the Hulk (the original green one), to suddenly turn stupid again? He was so clever and awesome in World War Hulk and the preceding Planet Hulk story arcs. Now he's back to He of the Substantially-Challenged Cortical Neurons. I don't mind a good fistful of "Hulk Smash" and "Hulk is strongest one there is," but he'd gotten to the point where he could say that, be burning with righteous fury, and snap off a clever one liner on the same page. So why bring back the retard version? Doesn't he remember Sakaar, Caiera and his Warbound anymore?

They had better do some solid explaining or I'd be inclined to do some smashing myself.

Quick Jabs: George, Storms and More Green Guys

George Carlin, 1937 - 2008. One of the greatest comedians ever, he's still my favorite. Here's to you, George, and fond memories of Frisbeetarianism, the Monday Night Executions, sun worship, attacking the children, dick fear in the Persian Gulf, germ obsession, Scab Aficionado Magazine, rewriting the Ten Commandments, balancing the US budget, advertising bullshit, and seven words I will not post in my blog.

Wherever you are, give em heaven or give them hell. But I know you'll give them something. You're too good not to speak up when you have something on your mind.

---


Have you been reading the news lately? Atypical typhoon patterns sinking ships, massive floods drowning whole towns and cities, freak lightning storms setting off hundreds of wildfires... It doesn't take a genius to see that something is seriously wrong.

Call it global warming if you want to. I'm calling it what it really is, and that's too many stupid people doing too many stupid things too quickly. Some people say the planet is dying. I say if it is dying, it'll at least do the universe a favor of taking humanity down with it.

However, I am quite optimistic in thinking that we'll die long before we do irreparable harm to the biosphere, and life will go on. Without us. Just faint, lingering memories, a few hundred thousand tons of non-biodegradable matter, and disintegrating monuments.

The Earth plus Plastic.

Something else George and I agree on.

Hulk Smash!

Now THIS is a Hulk movie. Just as Chris Nolan's Batman Begins redeemed the franchise after being violated by Joel Schumacher, this Hulk movie puts to rest that protoplasmic piece of refuse that Ang Lee made.

The action was great, and the destruction was even better. It might have even made Michael Bay proud. Things were smashed, collateral damage was widespread, and despite it all, the film still pushes through the simple concept that the US military can't understand: The best way to deal with the Hulk, is to leave him alone. That's what you do with forces of nature. Deal with the effects, but don't provoke it. Doing so just invokes disasters and abominations (pun intended). The contrast, and closeness, between monster and man was fully realized in a glorious 2 hours that even paid tribute to the TV series of old, with homages that would have made a true green fan smile.

The Tony Stark cameo at the end of the film gives us another look at the future glory of the coming Avengers film. I have to say again how perfect the casting of Robert Downey Jr. and Ed Norton were for their respective roles. If they can continue this trend with Thor and Captain America, I'm reserving my theater seat right now.

How am I supposed to wait till 2010 and 2011?

D&D 4E - Nerf Hammer

Of all the changes made in 4th Edition, the one that strikes me the most is how they've changed the efficiency and power of magic, that one element which virtually defines the fantasy role-playing genre.

Let me make it simple. Old edition magic had two qualities. First, magic was strong. Dungeons and Dragons is a game with combat and conflict. A majority of the game's mechanics and rules revolve around the concept that there will come a time when you have to kill something, or be killed yourself. The previous three editions had characters with the ability to use magic spells, be they called magic-users or clerics or wizards or druids or sorcerers, serving as the benchmark for what was raw power in such a fight. Magical power starts out as mediocre to decent at low levels, with the wizard having the power to use magic only a few times daily before becoming exhausted. But this quickly changes upon reaching 5th or 6th level, when spells suddenly become the combat-warping effects that they are known to be.

Ask any veteran of what I shall call The Old Ways, and they can immediately name a slew of powerful combat spells that make the wizard an invaluable asset on the battlefield. Magic Missile, Fireball, Cone of Cold, Cloudkill, Flamestrike, Disintegrate, Power Word Kill. All these spells and more will evoke a response from someone familiar with the old system.

And these are just the spells that harm. The beneficial spells aren't a slouch either. Words like Haste, Stoneskin, Heal, Raise Dead, and the whole array of Cure [insert any affliction known to man and god here], are part of veteran gamer canon speech.

The second quality of old edition magic was that it was convenient. A high level spellcaster can have dozens of spells in his arsenal, with dozens more to choose from to fit various needs. Each of these spells can be cast in one combat round on the average, with some of the stronger ones taking up to a minute. Like raising the dead back to life. Yes. You can raise the dead back to life in a minute or less.

Plus, the convenience of magic also extends to the effects that can be produced by magic spells. Practically any hindrance, obstacle or delay can be negated by a high level caster in the party. Worried about hidden devices? Use Find Traps. Your GM decides to hit one of the party with that once-in-a-campaign illness? Remove Disease. Locked door? Cast Knock, or use Passwall if you're feeling mighty. Go up that suspicious-looking winding staircase? Nah, just cast Mass Fly. Cross that desert? No. Teleport is your answer. Not sure who the thief is? Detect Evil or Discern Lies will do.

Magic was so good, and so easy to use that it even supplanted the skills and abilities of the other character classes.

Of course, I'm using the word was, suggesting correctly that this is no longer the case in 4th Edition. Largely, with few exceptions, in 4th Edition, magic got nerfed.

And it got nerfed solidly.

Magical effects were weakened by toning down the effects, making them more inconvenient to use (hooray for rituals), or both. In some cases, certain spells were removed entirely, for balance, or even mechanical issues (a not-so-fond farewell to the Polymorph class of magical effects). The number of magical effects spellcasters can use is now at par with the powers of other classes.

What does this mean? For starters, spellcasters are no longer the absolute benchmarks for high level power. Classes are more even now in terms of usefulness, even at high levels, and all of them are there to serve a specific role. Class abilities are no longer easily supplanted by magic. And this also means that the stereotype of the uber-powerful mage who can take on the entire party by himself is no longer possible. The minions of the evil wizard are not just fluff to get in the party's way. They're necessary to keep the evil mage alive.

As a role-playing-centric Game Master, I'm also relieved that I no longer have to explain why convenient magic didn't warp the way of life in fantasy societies. Think about what would happen in the real world if you had a class of citizens who could Detect Evil at will, and you'll see what I mean from this singular example.

To be fair, I've never played a primary spellcaster class before. I don't know how some spellcaster players will find the drop in their power levels. I'm sure many will be disappointed, even angry, and refuse to play this horrible new version of their favorite game. But as objectively as possible, I view this particular change in the D&D paradigm as a good one.

Spectacular Spider-Man Ep13 - Best Friends Forever

Having watched the season ender of Spectacular Spider-Man, I have to say it warms my heart to see two classic partners dancing so elegantly together.

The first season of Spider-Man's latest animated series had a relatively fast-paced development, introducing most of Spidey's classic (and not so classic) villains gallery in less than 13 episodes, including Green Goblin, Dr. Octopus, Electro, Rhino, Shocker, The Lizard and Black Cat. So when the symbiote is introduced in the last few episodes, you're more or less expecting Venom to pop up during the climax. And pop up he did. Over half the episode was a swinging, clinging, leaping, smashing battle between Venom and Spidey, with the safety of Aunt May and Gwen as part of the stakes.

When you consider the whole "symbiote" arc of the first season, I considered it a very good treatment of the symbiote and its effects on Peter, as well as its subsequent rejection. A friend and I both opined that if Sam Raimi had just taken the last several episodes and modified them for maturity and movie continuity, it would have made Spider-Man 3 infintely better.

My one criticism of the climax is the same as that of Kung Fu Panda. Where's the body? What happened to Eddie? Despite the Thanksgiving holiday with Aunt May and Gwen, it's out of character for a golden heart like Peter not to think about or be concerned regarding what happened to his "bro."

Still, an excellent first season, with some of the best characterizations of Petey, Gwen and MJ since the pages of Ultimate Spider-Man and Spider-Man Loves Mary Jane. The ending itself, without giving anything specific away, evokes anticipation of the next season's climax, suggesting images of a glider-borne villain, a blond, and a bridge.

Looking forward to it.

Double Feature - Of Mice and Pandas

I finally got to watch both Prince Caspian and Kung Fu Panda this weekend, and also got to enjoy a lovely Father’s Day weekend with my wife.

Prior to watching the movies, the whole family, my daughter and her grandparents included, went to a place called the Museum Café to have a Father’s Day buffet. The food was excellent, and included crabfat risotto, beef tenderloin tapa-style, roast lamb, fresh oysters, sushi, and Peking-style duck rolls. The giveaway bottles of wine for the dads were a nice punctuation to the meal.

Only problem was, to beat the heat, we had reserved a table inside the resto, only to discover that the air-conditioning was malfunctioning. To add insult to injury, there was a fresh breeze blowing outside, meaning we would have been much more comfortable dining in the shade than indoors, where there were only a few electric fans to keep cool.

The whole air-conditioning situation turned what would have been a great experience into just a good one, but I’m not really complaining. Enjoying great food with your family is always nice, heat or no heat.

---

Regarding Prince Caspian, I’ll say up front that I liked this better than The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. The character development was more solid, and themes were more mature than the previous movie. The primary Narnian elements were still there, including Aslan coming to save the day in the end, though with a woody, leafy twist revolving around his "Things never happen the same way twice" wisdom. I'll leave the Aslan-Jesus comparisons to other people. If I'm going to be talking about the breakout character of this film, I'm afraid it's not the lion, nor is it Prince Caspian (the Tenth!).

No. It would have to be none other than the mouse. THE Mouse.

Yes, I'm talking about Reepicheep, that small furry whirlwind of pure arrogance and deadly skill. If you watch this movie, prepare to be amazed. If you thought Frodo and the berserking Hobbits in Lord of the Rings were impressive, you haven't seen anything yet. This mouse may look like a swashbuckling musketeer or a master swordsman, but he also possesses what some people might call "l33t n1nj4 sk1llz."

This isn't an incredibly movie, mind you, but it is good. The coming sequel, The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, becomes more attractive as a result. And to top it off, the mouse has a starring role there too.

---

Now, Prince Caspian was good. Kung Fu Panda was awesome. They weren't kidding when they told you to prepare for awesomeness. This movie was either incredibly funny, wonderfully exciting, or both at the same time. Even the calmer moments had me smiling. A great story, wonderful cast, excellent characters, and superb CG animation made for the most entertaining movie so far this summer, rivaled only perhaps by Iron Man.

I can make very few criticisms, and they revolve around the climax. The movie ended on a nice note, but the climax deserved a better aftermath. I for one, demand two things from defeating the villain. First, I must see a body. Dead, mutilated, unconscious, bound, gagged, whatever. There must be a body. Second, I must at least have verbal affirmation of what happened to said body. Both of these requirements were, sadly, denied me.

My only consolation is that this opens up multiple avenues for a sequel. And for a movie this good, a sequel must indeed follow. The whole concept is just too awesome for a single film.

Quick Jabs: Call Me Queen

What's with the number of Captain Americas floating around in the Marvel universe these days? For a guy who was assassinated and officially died, he's certainly manifested in different places. Let's see, besides the original dead one, we have former sidekick Bucky, aka. Winter Soldier being the pseudo-official replacement, aka. the Cap with a gun, with another possible Cap wannabe emerging from the Red Skull's present plotting. Then there's the Cap from the past in Avengers-Invaders. Then there's the Captain America that emerged from the Skrull vessel in Secret Invasion.

Am I missing any other Captain America? There may just be one or two more...

---

And speaking of Secret Invasion, just for the record, she can be my queen any day...

Jessica Drew / Queen Veranke. You have to admit she looks good on a throne.

Secret Invasion - Nick Fury's Wall of Paranoia

Before we begin, here's the wall I'm talking about (image borrowed with thanks from the Wizarduniverse.com website since I'm presently too lazy to get my own scan):

It shows Nick Fury, when he was still in hiding, some time prior to the invasion, mulling over a wall of heroes. Obviously he's busied himself trying to determine who might be a Skrull, and who isn't. Thing is, he's got these circles around some pictures. Some are blue and some are red.

Now I know it's a tease from the author. But I can't help myself.

Let's take this wall from what we know so far up to Secret Invasion #3.

The ones encircled in red are: Wolverine, the Sentry, Hulkling and Doctor Strange.

The ones encircled in blue are: Daredevil, Spider-Man, Lockjaw, Namor and Stature.

First, let us try assuming the extreme, that one color represents identified Skrulls, and the other represents confirmed non-Skrulls. A Skrull version of Daredevil was recently seen in an issue of New Avengers just prior to the invasion, trying to get rid of and possibly replace Echo. Also, it was confirmed in Mighty Avengers 14 that the Skrulls were unable to copy Sentry's power set, and thus were unable to replace him. This would imply that Wolverine, Hulkling and Dr Strange are normal, and that Spidey, Lockjaw, Namor and Stature are Skrulls. Given the events of One More Day, this means that reality was altered and Spidey's marriage removed because Mephisto got tricked by a Skrull shapeshifter.

Seriously, highly unlikely.

If Spidey was a Skrull, then this would make OMD a hundred times more absurd, if that were possible. Besides, it's very possible that the real DD was very active at the time the fake one attacked Echo (as with the Invisible Woman as correlated between SI#1 and SI: Fantastic Four #1). Meaning the DD-Skrull was only temporarily taking DD's form to trick Echo that one time.

That brings us to our second interpretation of the circles, that red means confirmed normals, and blue means SUSPECTED Skrulls. This seems a more feasible and open interpretation of Fury's paranoia wall. Note that Fury could easily make errors. At this time, confirmed Skrull replacement Black Bolt is not even circled. Also, Fury himself confided in Spider Woman, even after observing her for days, because he believed at least in part that she was the original article. And we know by this time that she was actually the Skrull Queen, Veranke herself.

Thus, I wouldn't be too serious about the wall. If Fury can make an error, anyone can.

D&D 4E - Powers

The new Dungeons and Dragons game has changed some of the most fundamental aspects of the original versions, while trying to remain true to the essence of what made the original paper and pen game such a classic.

One of the things it mostly threw out the window was how character class abilities and spells worked. Aside from the most essential class features, most class-related abilities, including spells, are now called powers. These powers are classified in three ways, particularly how they relate to combat:

At-Will Powers are those that can be used every round, once per round.

Encounter Powers are those that can only be used once per encounter. The use of these powers can be restored after a short rest.

Daily Powers are those that prove so draining that they can only be used once before requiring an extended rest to restore its efficacy.

Powers manifest from different sources depending on what class you are. Wizards draw from the arcane and their powers are called spells. Clerics use divine power and use prayers. Fighters have martial power and use exploits (I would have called them techniques or styles, but that's just me). Gaining these abilities is a simple matter of increasing in level. All classes progress with gaining powers at the same rate:

At level 1, you select 2 at-will powers, 1 encounter power, and 1 daily power from those available to your class.

You gain a new encounter attack power at levels 3, 7 and 11, with the option to replace those with a stronger one at 13th, 17th, 23rd, and 27th levels.

You gain a new daily attack power at levels 5, 9, and 20, with the option to replace those with stronger daily powers at 15th, 19th, 25th, and 29th levels.

You also gain a new utility power at levels 2, 6, 10, 12, 16, 22 and 26.

Whenever you gain a level, regardless of whether you received anything new, you are able to replace one existing power with another one of equal or lower level.

This very simple system dictates that no matter what class you are, be you wizard or fighter, you have the same number of powers of a certain type (ignoring special cases like humans who gain an extra at-will power at 1st level). This means even fighters have "spells" of their own, and that the days of the high level wizard slinging a dozen each of fireballs, lightning bolts, ice storms and what have you are things of the past.

The best thing about this, for me, is that all classes now have significant abilities even at high levels, which go beyond their hit points or equipment. There is reason to feat the high-level exploit as much as the high level spell. Let's compare the effects of two such powers, both level 23 encounter attack powers:

3d6 + Intelligence modifier thunder damage, and the target is stunned until the end of your next turn. [Ranged 20]

4[W] + Strength modifier damage. Weapon: If you’re wielding an axe, you gain a bonus to the damage roll equal to your Constitution modifier.

Both are comparably strong. Though the fighter exploit does more raw damage, the spell makes up for it with range. And there's no "strictly better" comparison, unlike when you compare the destructive potential of an 18th level wizard versus that of an 18th level fighter from 3rd edition. And note, none of the comparisons I'm making take equipment into account.

That's another nice effect of the new power paradigm. Each class is so full of features that equipment, while still important and valuable, is no longer overwhelmingly necessary for characters to become interesting. If a DM wanted to, he could create a low-magic setting where mystical items and artifacts are rare, and the characters are still capable of many things.

Any system with this much class balance and emphasis on the character (not his gear) has a thumbs up from me.

Final Crisis Mixup Clarified (?)

Grant Morrison, master writer of the grand, bizarre and ambiguous, was recently interviewed by Newsarama about the inner workings of Final Crisis 1. While the interview does nothing to exonerate Morrison from the rest of the failings of Final Crisis' first issue (aka. boring and lacking in impact, as well as being a burden to those not well versed in the DC universe), it does free him from the burden of being a continuity monkey.

In summary, DC editorial screwed up continuity by providing Grant Morrison with a 2-year project based on the events from 52 and prior, but was unable to provide proper overlap with both the Countdown to Final Crisis and Death of the New Gods, which, though they were created after Final Crisis, were inexplicably released before said mini-series. The result of which is a mess which can only be dismissed as "You would enjoy Final Crisis more if you didn't read the weekly series that was supposed to lead to Final Crisis."

What are we as readers supposed to do? If you read the continuity-related series that led up to Final Crisis, the continuity of Final Crisis confuses you, but the events and characters contained therein are okay. If you don't read the continuity-related series leading to Final Crisis, you enjoy Final Crisis more, but have to pull out a dozen Wikipedia pages just to keep up with who's who and how they got to where they are.

Congratulations to the DC editorial pool. Once more their inability to comprehend the meaning and impact of a continuity series gets in the way of enjoying what might have been a perfectly good book. Or at least a decent one, when you consider that Morrison is writing it.

Review: Secret Invasion 3 (Marvel)

Talking about this third installment of the Secret Invasion mini-series, I could discuss how incredibly potent the new warskrulls are as they take out the Young Avengers and multiple members of the Initiative. Or I could talk about the official return of Nick Fury and his attempt to turn the tide of battle, with his new Howling Commandos in tow. Or I could even mention how cool Jarvis-Skrull was when he asked Maria Hill for the unconditional surrender of S.H.I.E.L.D., while still dressed in his normal butler outfit.

But I'll leave those things as minor events, at least compared to this little zinger:




Jessica Drew, aka Spider Woman, aka Skrull Queen-in-disguise, coolly and casually performs in what is either the greatest reveal of the series (be it suspected or not by the readers), or what is definitely a solidly destabilizing mind-fuck on Tony Stark.

This totally blew me away. Besides being a great piece of writing, the scene has so many implications, even though the going theory of course is that Tony really isn't a Skrull, since that would be too easy an "out" for everything Tony has been doing from the Civil War onward. He's Marvel's biggest goat right now, the can everyone gets to kick, the jerk people love to hate. To make him into one of the sleeper Skrull agents would sully all the work the writers have done into making him the Marvel U's Greatest HEEL Ever.Even previous weasels like Henry Peter Gyrich have nothing on what Tony has now, and I doubt that simplifying his actions as part of his subliminal sleeper-Skrull programming would be the decision the Marvel bullpen would make to restore his hero reputation among the readership.

No. Tony's road to redemption is going to be hard, painful, and paved with broken parts.

But despite my beliefs, I tip my hat off to the Skrull Queen. A masterful stroke.

Indeed, who can you trust?

Filipino Superheroes in Invincible Iron Man 2

I find it difficult to express what I'm feeling right now as I write this. On a whim, for lack of anything better to download at the time, I grabbed a scan of The Invincible Iron Man 2, just to see if it was a comic that could hold my interest. I seriously doubted that at the time, since it was about Iron Man, a guy who I've considered a jerk since the events of Civil War.

I was shocked, then rather pleased, when the action in the middle of the book cut to a scene set in Manila, Philippines! It showed the following team of Philippine superheroes, being officially thanked for helping save lives when a tsunami hit Philippine shores:


And I thought, Wow! A Marvel writer portraying non-American, non-British heroes? That's incredible!

It wasn't just that these were Philippine superheroes. It was more that Marvel as a universe almost always portrayed its heroes entirely set in the United States. Even superheroes from other nations ended up in the US, so the feeling of a global superhero community in the MArvel universe is practically nonexistent.

This was a pleasant, if fleeting change, I mused.

Fleeting indeed. Because two pages later, we have this:


Nice. Introduce some new faces to show that other nations have costumed heroes too, then blow them up with human bombs dressed as local monks to demonstrate how badass the villain is. Buddhist monks! In the Philippines! A primarily CATHOLIC country! In front of a Catholic Church. Something does not compute here. I guess the local superheroes never noticed.

What doubly sucks is that this sets it up so that our white, mustached, armored hero can justifiably fry the villain's hide in some later issue.

Okay. I'm griping a bit. At least Matt Fraction did his research on the proper words to the burial rites. And he did give honor to at least one of the fallen heroes by having this guy show up for Anitun's funeral:


Thor even gave a nice verbal tribute to her right in Tony's face...


Still feels odd. Kinda like I've been indirectly slighted.

Rest in peace guys. Long live the Triumph Division (wonder how that translates in the local vernacular).

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

I sat down in the movie theater with simple expectations, something I noticed is important in enjoying films like this. I didn't come in expecting to see something as wondrously amazing as an installment of the Lord of the Rings trilogy (my gold standard for the near perfect film experience, geek that I am).

My wants as a fan of the original 3 films were easy. I wanted at least 2 vehicular chases (1 conventional and 1 exotic), whip swinging, breaking windows, one scene involving snakes, deathtraps, puzzle doors, several fistfights, riddles and being chased by natives.

And what do you know? I got all that and a bit more. Classic Indiana Jones stuff, and the homages to the earlier films were a nice touch. Some new elements too. The most extreme being surviving a hydrogen bomb test in a refrigerator.

My friends and I had a great time.

So how does this stack against the other three films? Using entertainment value as my only criteria, I enjoyed this more than Temple of Doom, but I liked Raiders and Last Crusade more.

Dungeons and Dragons 4th Edition - Alignment

I've always been against the concept of alignment, being of the mind that no person is completely good or evil, and that an entire setting system with integral components revolving around being centered on one or the other is silly.

I mean, if it were that easy to tell who's evil or not, why the hell aren't there paladins and clerics walking around good societies weeding out the evil on a daily basis by performing random scans on the populace? That alone should alter the whole paradigm of how that kind of society would work. And that musing is just off the top of my head.

Don't get me started on how many debates have been made on what constitutes as good or evil, by action or omission, especially in the context of the pre-4E paladin and the chance of "losing your divine powers" and reverting to "a common fighter" till "atonement is made."

Ugh.

Thankfully, 4E seems to have lifted much of the importance of alignment in its structure. The original editions had nine alignments, as well as overtly elaborate, yet still lacking, definitions on what counted as what. Certain alignment definitions came out as awkward or half-baked, while others were defined to rigidly and lacked flexibility.

The new edition simplifies things into 5 alignments, though their terminology could use some elaboration (that last opinion really isn't important and is a manifestation of my OC tendencies). The five alignments are Lawful Good, Good, Unaligned, Evil, and Chaotic Evil. The book does a good job in defining each of these, but they can easily be summarized in a statement or two:

Lawful Good - "I will do whatever is of greatest benefit for everyone and my society."

Good - "I want what's best for those I care about."

Unaligned - "I just want to survive and be happy."

Evil - "I am willing to hurt selected individuals and manipulate the system for my personal benefit."

Chaotic Evil - "I'll do anything to get what I want, and I'll get rid of anyone or anything that gets in my way."

The book goes on to state that most people, players characters included, are unaligned. Which is quite true. And here, given the new definitions, the alignments are more flexible in their interpretations, plus, it hints that alignment in general is more an interpretation of how the character is acting at present, in general, than a conscious decision to uphold the cause of good or evil. After all, even good people do things which can be interpreted as evil once in a while.

It's a step in the right direction. Now if only they'd remove it as a line item entirely. Hmm... Maybe in Fifth Edition.

Dungeons and Dragons 4th Edition - Races

The first thing about 4th Edition player races you're going to notice just by looking at the table of contents, is that Gnomes and Half-Orcs are gone. My guess is that they were the least popular of the original races. Gnomes, because they're the bard version of the halfling/dwarf comparison. And half-orcs, because while they're strong and powerful, they're portrayed as being ugly and physically unattractive. Like it or not, we're a visually-oriented species, and if you're going to make a character, they either have to be be good-looking from a human perspective, or they have to look COOL if they're not human-like in appearance.

The consensus, I suppose, is that half-orcs are neither good-looking or cool.

With those two races gone, they have been replaced by two new races (Eladrin and Dragonborn), and what I suspect is a favorite from 3rd edition (Tieflings). I'll get to the specifics of those new races later, but first, let's move onto the general changes one sees from the 3rd Ed standards.

No more racial penalties. All races have nothing but bonuses now. There are no more races which are inherently clumsier, less healthy, or less intelligent than other races. Part of the drive to engineer everything towards bonuses instead of penalties. It's not that your race is less intelligent. It's that the other race is inherently SMARTER. The half-full glass wins over the half-empty one.

They went out of their way to make all races attractive, both for roleplayers and straight up gamers, making it so that there's a reason to pick one race over another in many regards. Take the halflings, for example. Many new players of mine used to ignore them completely in 3rd edition. Here, they get the coveted "negate an opponent's critical hit" once per encounter. Being able to stop your foes from smacking you with a natural 20 once per fight is a BIG thing.

For roleplayers, the societal and cultural impact of the maximum lifespans of the long-lived races has been minimized by simply reducing said lifespans. Eladrin are the only race to live over 300 years, with elves and dwarves living to be about 200.

For the new races, let's begin with the Dragonborn. Obviously meant to replace the half-orc, they get the coveted +2 Str bonus on top of getting a bonus on Cha. They're a dragon-based reptilian race, which gives them a coolness factor half-orcs don't have, despite the fact that they look nonhuman. Getting to use dragonbreath once per encounter is also a plus.

The Eladrin might as well be called fae elves, though the book's alt terminology for them is high elf or gray elf. Technically, they split the characteristics of the 3E elves into two races. Eladrin get the quickness, the smarts, and the longsword skills. They also get the charm resistance and a new teleport ability. You want the woodland smarts and the archery? Stick to the original elves.

Lastly, the Tieflings are still the beings of infernal ancestry they were in the previous version of the game, more clearly so now given their large horns, but hey, that's cool too. Their abilities might be considered the weakest set of all the races, given that they have Intelligence and Charisma bonuses, but their racial ability is oriented to physical combat. This is not to say that they're not a good race, but I predict they'll be the least attractive of the basic races offered in this first handbook.

One last comment. About the humans? Still the excellent default choice. Good show, WotC.

Review: Mighty Avengers 14

Mighty Avengers 14 is a tie-in to the greater Secret Invasion major continuity storyline of Marvel. This story is focused on the Sentry, after he freaks out when one of the opposing Skrulls shapeshifts into a semblance of his schizo-induced nemesis The Void.

The whole issue's core ideas about the Sentry can be summed up better by the characters themselves:

Skrull Queen: "If he's such a risk, why does Stark keep him around?"
Jarvis-Skrull: "Because he doesn't know what else to do with him."
Skrull Queen: "Well, we finally have something in common with Tony Stark."

Also, this lovely snippet from Doctor Doom in an earlier Mighty Avengers issue, also regarding the Sentry:

Dr. Doom: "Your friend is not well."

After seeing the following comic panels, I'm very much inclined to agree...


Do not waaaaaaant...


He runs away very quickly doesn't he? That's the moon...


That's the asteroid belt. Major freakout expression right here.


I think the penciller of this issue captured the Sentry's emotional and mental state perfectly, don't you?


The Crying Game in space. These images are simply beyond words.

Yep. Nothing more needs to be said about the issue. I don't know whether to laugh or feel disturbed.

Ben 10 Alien Force - Season 1 Opener

Ben 10 was one of the more popular of Cartoon Network's original offerings, getting fans beyond its intended 8-12 target demographic due to its surprisingly entertaining stories, excellent premise, and occasional leaning towards something resembling a continuity instead of a mere episodic, static reality.

It has taken some time, but now the producers have decided to continue the series, quite literally, shifting the timeline ahead 5 years and likely promoting more mature themes and plots. The title character, Ben Tennyson, is now a strapping teen of 15 years, and his cousin Gwen and former-antagonist-now-ally (?!?) Kevin are about 17.

The series opens with Grandpa Max missing, and Ben somewhat reluctantly puts the Omnitrix back on to again take up the reins of heroism. Of course, the process by which he removed it in the first place didn't seem to be so conducive to reusing the device. Of course, he eventually gets it working again, but only after it predictably changes into a more compact form, offering a new array of alien bodies to choose from (and thus opening a new line of merchandising for CN).


It's hero time... or not. Omnitrix troubles all over again.

The first two episodes of the season opened in the right way: lots of action, a decent amount of character development and establishing the new status quo.

Gwen, I have to admit, has matured very... uh... well over the last 5 years. The character design and fashion sense get 4 stars from me. The missing star is from the decision to keep her wearing a relatively sort skirt despite the fact that she's now a woman of action. But, oh YES, she can kick ass. Hot redhead, big heart, good personality, and buttkicking cosmic sorcery. Gotta love that.


Good looks, cosmic energy manipulation and a no-nonsense attitude. Definitely a winning combination.

Kevin is introduced as the anti-hero of the series, though of course, he starts out as a complete jerk again, but starts on the slow path to redemption by the end of the second episode.


Kevin versus Swampfire. He really should stop embarrassing himself like this.

The whole idea of placing Kevin in the anti-hero role, of course, translates to him becoming the real heartthrob and focus of interest for the older audience. Think Wolverine of the X-Men or Prince Zuko from Avatar, The Last Airbender and you'll understand what I mean. His new relationship with Ben isn't remotely as interesting as the implied potential between him and Gwen.


And thus, with a single look, the sexual tension begins.

The first three alien forms that were introduced are distinct enough from each other, and more importantly, from the ones in the original series, to hold their own, though I'm sure that one or the other will have their own fans and haters. I'm perfectly willing to give them a chance to shine on their own merits. I only hope they eventually bring back his access to the old forms. I miss Gray Matter already.


Swampfire. He has something of a gas problem.


Echo. Ten times the fun. And loud. Very loud.


Humongousaur. Big and strong. No. Bigger than that.

I have just a single bit of minor irritation. Nothing majorly significant, but really, what's with the random morphing of the Omnitrix into a more compact form? Yes, I know it's probably linked to its function in some way, but I hope they eventually take time to explain it. I have my own theory on the matter. It's supposed to be a learning tool so that different races can learn more about each other, and not all aliens have the same sized or shaped appendages, nor do they all have skin, or even wrists for that matter. I suppose the 'Trix can shift its physical form to accommodate whatever alien happens to be using it. Y'know, so it doesn't fall off. What do you guys think?

Whether or not they explain it eventually, Ben 10 is back on my watch list. Alien Force notwithstanding.


New Omnitrix. New series. Here's to good times.